Our Story
Then…
“Do you think Robbie is alive?”  The Ontario Provincial Police officer didn’t answer right away. Then he gently said, “We’re almost certain that if your son were alive he would have been able to get away by now.”
The question that Shirley Brown had dared not think about, never mind ask out loud, was out in the open.
After Shirley said goodbye to the OPP officer, the meaning of his words became clear to her. Two and a half years had passed since the events that would change the life of her and her family forever.
It had been a warm day on the 3rd of August 1968 in the small town of Pefferlaw, just north of Toronto, Ontario. It was the time of the year when Shirley Brown’s church had its annual family camp meeting. It was a time for rejuvenation, with Bible studies for the adults and
activities for the children. 9-year-old Ross Jr. and 6-year-old Mike were enjoying camp with their friends while Shirley took 12-year-old Robbie and 10-month-old Cathy to the beach to get away from the summer heat.
Shirley reflected on the special bond between her eldest son and her daughter. While not initially overjoyed with a baby sister underfoot, Robbie’s misgivings soon changed to deep affection for his youngest sibling. Cathy’s face would light up when she saw Robbie and would hold out her arms to be picked up.
After enjoying a swim, Robbie, being a responsible and young entrepreneur left his mother and sister to go home and attend to his daily paper route. With the afternoon drawing to a close, Shirley and Cathy packed up to rejoin Ross Jr. and Mike at camp. Shirley and the kids arrived at home just behind Ross Sr. as he pulled into the driveway. It was 6:30 p.m. Scooping up Cathy in his arms, Ross looked around.
“Where’s Robbie?” he asked.
“He’s doing his papers. He should be back by now,” said Shirley. Ross Jr. went to look for his brother, but soon came home alone. “Mom, I can’t find him anywhere,” he said. That’s strange. Where could he be? A quick check revealed a bundle of papers sitting on the curb, untouched. What has he been doing for the past two and half hours?
The boys pitched in and delivered the papers while Shirley prepared dinner. This was so unlike her son. Just wait till he gets home. I’ll ground him for a week! All through dinner her thoughts continually strayed to the front door, waiting for the sound of his footsteps…
After dinner Ross and the boys went to the camp to look for Robbie. They also drove through the side streets asking anyone they met if they had seen Robbie. Shirley ran to the front door as Ross and the boys returned. She anticipated seeing Robbie with them. But her blue eyed and blond haired Robbie was not with them. It was 9:00 p.m. Several people had seen Robbie during the day, but not during the last several hours. He had…vanished.
A feeling of dread welled up inside Shirley. She looked at her husband of more than a decade and said, “Ross, I think we’d better call the police.”
The police arrived within minutes. Shirley and Ross told them everything they could think of. Someone had seen Robbie about 4:15 p.m. heading towards the beach. Had Robbie drowned? Unlikely. He was wearing his swim trunks underneath his clothing. If he had gone back into the water, why were his jeans not found at the beach? Robbie who was a strong swimmer would have also have had to walk several hundred yards to reach water deep enough for swimming.
Was Robbie happy at home? Could he have run away? the police wanted to know. There were no rifts at home. In fact Robbie was looking forward to starting a new part time job where Ross Sr. worked. No. That was not the answer either.
Police organized a search. On the ground. In the air. In the water. Nothing. No trace. More tired and discouraged with every passing hour, the Browns waited…and prayed.
By morning, the media had picked up news of Robbie’s disappearance. Shock spread through the small tight knit community. Neighbours and family came to help with meals and care for the children. People from as far as 60 miles away came to help with the search. Shirley was moved by the generosity of people, especially since many of them didn’t even know the family. Shirley’s friend Jo Crandell arrived, took one look at her and promptly ordered her to bed. “Jo, I need to pray,” said Shirley. “Shirley, you go to bed and I’ll pray for you.”
Later in the afternoon Shirley had to go and do something. Anything. Shirley went down to the beach to see how she could help. She was not prepared for what she saw. A human chain slowly walking through the water with their eyes cast downward. Not a search…a body recovery. I’ve got to get home.
Ross Sr. was already at home when Shirley arrived. He could tell by the look on her face that something was terribly wrong. Running past him the tears burst from deep within Shirley and all the hurt, grief and anguish poured out of her soul. Ross put his arms around her and held her. There were no words he could say to ease the pain. They could only share their grief together.
The next week was exceptionally hard on the Brown family. The police continued their search under the assumption that Robbie had drowned. They also kept questioning Shirley, Ross, friends and neighbours to make sure they were really telling the truth. Covering the same ground over and over was taking its toll on the close-knit family. Finally the questions stopped as police were finally convinced they were telling the truth.
By the end of the first week, there were many reports of Robbie being seen at different places in Ontario. Eager excitement turned to bitter disappointment as each lead proved to be false. Their hope was slowly being crushed. The search also brought out charlatans with false promises and insensitive people who wanted to spare Shirley and Ross no details about the fate of missing children. The uncertainty and…not knowing was almost a burden too great to bear. They realized that only the efforts of the authorities and God would bring Robbie home to them.
Ross Jr. and Mike also bore the burden of their missing brother. As school began in the fall the usually happy and outgoing brothers became quiet and withdrawn. They distanced themselves from their classmates and were reluctant to join in activities. As time passed they became more outgoing and started being active and spirited boys again.
Shirley too had changed. She was afraid to let the boys out of her sight. She struggled with the fear that something would happen if she didn’t protect them. Realizing that this was not fair to her sons, she was able to let go her desire to wrap her boys in a security blanket of concern and caution.
“Do you think Robbie is alive?”
After hoping, praying, waiting, crying and wondering for over two years whether Robbie would ever be found, Shirley had found the courage to ask the final question. Shirley and Ross were also sure that if their eldest son were still alive, his circumstances would not be good. It was almost with a sense of relief to finally accept that Robbie was dead and would never be coming home.
That evening Shirley told Ross Jr. and Mike that they thought Robbie was dead. With tears flowing, they understood. They would never forget their brother.
Shirley and Ross now knew that Robbie was with God and the angels. And even heaven was improved by his presence there.
…And Now
In spite of all known efforts to find Robbie, there were no clues, no hints, and no answers to help us understand what might have occurred on that terrible day. Who could do such a thing and why, are questions that may never be answered.
Thirty-five years have passed since Robbie disappeared. Our experiences through those years have caused us to want to help others who have experienced similar losses.
According to the R.C.M.P., the number of missing children reports each year is in the tens of thousands. These numbers include runaways and parental, as well as stranger abductions.
There are organizations to help find missing children, and organizations to find those responsible for the child’s disappearance. At “Courage to Cope” we want to support the families with missing children because we understand the pain.